I know a lot of you are following me every week, so I thought this would be a good time to introduce myself and my story, so you understand how I got here and how I am just like you. On this journey, I have met people who are ten years ahead of me and I have met people who are ten years behind me in their healing. I am sure it is set up that way so I can see where I am going and then, when needed, I can see where I have been. It is also set up that way so I can meet people who can teach me and then I meet those who want to be taught. Everyone is a teacher, and everyone is a student. As you progress on your journey, people will be brought into your circle who need your knowledge and wisdom, and it will be your duty to give that knowledge freely. We are all here to learn and to progress to a higher level of knowledge and happiness and we need each other to do that. We all end up in the same place when we die, but while we are here our individual stories are who we meet along the way. Some stay in our lives for a long time, some are in and out, and some come back – but it is always about what they teach us and all the lessons we learn during our time here.
When I look back on my life, I can see how it all was orchestrated to get me right here. I am who I am because of every single experience, and take one of those out, and I would be different. I love my kids, and they are my everything, so for that reason alone I have no regrets in my life and would not change a thing. Could I have made it easier, absolutely, but then I would have skipped a lesson, and those lessons are where I found all my knowledge and found all my strength. When life is easy, we aren’t learning, it is in the struggles and the hard times where we grow.
My life may have been considered hard and from the age of nine years old filled with more death, divorces, heartache and despair than one person would sign up for. Looking back now, I can see how my life has shown me both sides of the coin and has set me up for a life of spiritual service to others. That is why I carry no grudges and can respect that everyone is on their own journey and has their own story and lessons to learn. That is also why in my blog, I will never use names or detailed stories. This is my journey, and no one’s story but my own. I am not here to judge or place blame on anyone. I have loved and been loved, and I have been hurt, and I have hurt others. Every choice I made in my life was my choice and I take full responsibility for everything good and bad, happy and sad, that has happened to me in my life. I will tell you that I have first-hand experience and can relate to dealing with death, losing both parents before the age of eighteen, divorce, starting over, being a single mom, military spouse, PTSD, alcoholism, cancer, suicide, along with the many good things that life has to offer such as being an artist, designer, teacher, writer, healer, wife, mother, college graduate, home owner, business owner, sister, niece, aunt, cousin, lover, best friend and everything good that life has to offer. This is my perspective, and these are my lessons. People who are, and have been, in my life signed up for their own journey and their own lessons so their perspective is different than mine and their story is only theirs to tell. This is all me – the same way your journey is all you.
I have known from the time I was a little girl that something about myself was different, but I did not embrace that difference until much later in life. Once I understood what an empath was, everything about myself made sense. I can feel what others are feeling, but I didn’t learn how to navigate through what that meant until later in life. When I was younger, I was a chameleon and took on everyone’s feelings as my own. Looking back, that was the root of my issues because instead of letting people work through their issues, I mistakenly believed they were mine. I couldn’t tell the difference between what my feelings were and what others were feeling. I would wait to see what people were feeling and that is how I determined how to act, how to react, that is who I was. There was a very thin line of where they ended, and where I began. Through my studies I have learned how to control what is mine and set boundaries for what isn’t. Over the past decade I have been mastering control over my thoughts and emotions, and I no longer hide the fact that I am an intuitive empath who receives messages and guidance through clairaudience. Once I embraced that spiritual side of myself, I became stronger and more confident in who I am. That was a very long road for me, but one I am very grateful for. That road is where I healed and gained all the knowledge which I am now passing on to you through my blogs every week.
My first glimpse into a spiritual world which included strength, confidence and healing was about fifteen years ago when I met a girl who taught me so much about what I know. She was a healer, and I have already mentioned her a few times throughout my posts. She introduced me to crystals, chakra balancing, essential oils and energy healing. She opened the door to a whole new world that I related to on every level and the validation I needed that I was not crazy - I was just different. From the moment we met, I began to understand who I was and everything about myself. When you come from a childhood filled with ghosts and people second guessing what you are experiencing, you begin to doubt yourself and hide that part of yourself from the world. My saving grace for not ever completely doubting myself was I had a childhood friend who experienced a few of these events with me. He is always my anchor to remember who I am and the one I look back on as a reminder that these experiences were real and did happen to me. We also used to go haunted house hunting, which looking back now, as people who were very open to experiencing the supernatural, was probably not a good idea lol. But we had fun doing it and it is a memory with him that I cherish to this day.
As I got older, I was always afraid of that side of myself. I didn’t understand what it was, and I didn’t understand what it meant to be open to that world. I felt like a freak, so I didn’t talk about it to anyone. I was no longer in contact with that one person who embraced that side of me, so I kept it hidden and tried to stuff it down as far as I could. What I have learned from this journey is that the further down you stuff parts of yourself, the stronger and louder they scream. At that same time after my whole life came crumbling down around me is when I made the decision to work on myself and listen to everything that was screaming to be heard. I began to listen. I began to love and accept everything about myself and in doing so I began to heal. I made the decision to embrace knowing that the first fifty years of my life were hard, but the next fifty I would be happy.
A few years later, I was led to The Southwest Institute of Healing Arts where I enrolled in their online Integrative Healing Arts Practitioner Program. It was an extensive two-year program where the goal is to help yourself so that you can help others. The program was life changing and the place where I met so many people who also had special gifts that they were keeping hidden, and they had also been through trauma and ready to take responsibility for their own lives. Knowing there was a whole community of people just like me was very comforting, and my learning became my safe space. My studies included classes about spiritual healing, hypnotherapy, aromatherapy, transpersonal psychology, religion, life coaching, meditation, stress and relaxation techniques and getting ready for a life of service. I was committed and for two years my life consisted of only what was necessary and that was work, kids, homework, and writing. I was hyper focused on healing from my past and taking control of my future and I had no space for anything else.
A few years ago, is when I really began to branch out and received my certification in Advanced Hypnotherapy, took a course in Healing through Art, and studied Reiki and became a Reiki Level 2 Practitioner. I felt that everything I learned was setting myself up for that moment. Then life, as always, had other plans and that old childhood friend reached out, burst the protective bubble I was living in, and I found myself packing up my life and moving back up north. I had been living in Florida, and after thirty years, I was ready to go back home and face the past I ran away from. I learned the hard way that you can run as far away from your past as you want, but it will always be right there waiting for you. Just when I thought I was healed, another layer of healing appeared. The comforting part is that each level is harder but is also easier because you are stronger and have learned to have trust and faith in yourself, in other people, and in life. You can see that we are all connected and there is a bigger plan in place for us and you must be open and trust the process. Even at 60 years old I am still a work in progress.
I have a niece who is very spiritual like me, but I am always amazed because she came into this world already knowing and understanding what it took me a lifetime to figure out. My take on that is it is orchestrated that way so we are all on the same level, at the same time, and we can relate to each other. Lightworkers are here and we must work together. When I was attending SWIHA the one thing we all had in common was we were ready to heal from our past, embrace who we are, and shine our light. My niece and people like her are born already shining their light. We are here on the same level now and with the same goal and, that is, to embrace our light and help each other heal. I am sure if you have made it this far in my blog, that is why you are here as well.
Wishing you peace, love and happiness on your journey.
In love and light,
Fran
No comments:
Post a Comment