When I heard this, it made complete sense to me because I am a former procrastinator. I would think things to death so afraid of making the wrong choice that I would end up making no choice. Overthinking turns into analysis paralysis. The problem with never trusting yourself to decide from this or that, here or there, is you end up staying in exactly the same place. That fear and indecision can keep you from growing and moving forward to what your heart desires. Your procrastination and never taking that leap of faith could be that one thing keeping yourself from living a beautiful and very fulfilling life.
Sometimes we can get so comfortable in our misery that making a choice to do anything differently seems so frightening and unattainable. Sometimes blocks are just walls of illusion we have put up for ourselves. Trusting in our healing and in our own choices is what will conquer your fear and remove those blocks. Our ego will tell us don’t do that because of this and don’t do this because of that. The ego tries to protect you from things which are now what you desire, because your ego has not yet learned that you are out of survival mode and just trying to live. We can get lost in our mind and in our thoughts so just staying the same feels more comfortable. It may seem easier, but it is definitely not better. You must learn to take charge of your ego and learn to trust yourself and break down those walls that are no longer needed.
When you have a big fear of change, your choices can start out as small as deciding what to have for dinner. The goal in the end is to be living a healthier way than you were in your past, so in the beginning just start small. Always start with choices that will be for yourself and what is in your best interest. Small choices and change leads to bigger choices and bigger changes. Looking too far down the road can be scary, so the one day at a time will come back into play. Always ask yourself what choice I can make for myself today that will benefit my joy and happiness. Remember that this will require you to come out of your comfort zone. When you have built walls of protection for yourself, small choices will be the best way to go so you don’t overwhelm yourself in change. Once you look back after a year or so you will be able to see how all those small changes you made for yourself, and all the choices to better yourself, they led you to big change. Once you are more comfortable with change and trusting your choices, these choices will become bigger and maybe all the way to a career change and new relationships. Choices will lead you to a positive life and you will begin to let go of what no longer serves you. You will begin to trust your choices and the vision you have for yourself. Detach in love from your past and be grateful for everything it taught you.
When I look back to my life a decade ago it is unrecognizable to my life now. Once you start making better choices for yourself, life seems to take you in a new direction, a healthier direction. I noticed once I started to trust and believe in the new life I was creating, all the people in my life also followed suit. We were all making better choices for ourselves and keeping each other accountable. We were learning that we were connected and what one person did or didn’t do for themselves affected the others. We are all connected energetically, so choosing to live a healthier, more productive life made life easier on each other. We were no longer worrying and waiting for the other shoe to drop; instead, we were all living our life and focusing on the positive and focusing on self. The crazy part is that when you focus on self and are happy, your relationships also become healthier. My son always says that you can tell the level of our healing by the way our conversations have changed. Our conversations used to revolve around drama and chaos, and now our conversations revolve around food and working out and self-healing. Our conversations revolve around what makes us happy.
Living a healthier, more peaceful life is a choice. Staying the same out of fear of change is also a choice. We get to decide which way we want to go. I understand that sometimes the fear of change comes from fearing people will not be happy with our choices, but that is people pleasing and a dangerous place to live. Most of us on this healing journey come from a past where negativity and toxicity had its grips on us. We were frozen and afraid to walk away from the people who hurt us. I can look back now with clarity and see that walking away would have been a healthy choice and staying is where I lost my sense of self. Staying in a toxic environment because you have a fear of walking away because you will be hurting the person who hurt you is a big red flag to work on self. Decisions we make should never come from a place of fear, guilt, shame or worrying about what outsiders will think or say, but always from a place of self-love. Our choices must come from our internal world and not our external world so that we are coming from a place of owning our own power. Our choices must come from within. When your choices are coming from a positive, healthy place and a place that you know is for positive and not negative, that’s when you know you can trust it.
The one thing I can tell you from my experience, is once you learn to trust in who you are and break through that fear of making new choices for yourself, so many new doors will open up for you. You will be presented with doors that you never even knew were there waiting for you. A life you never imagined for yourself begins to unveil itself. I believe that once you make a choice for change and for a life that is healthier and more positive, then right away the Universe will have your back and show you more. You feel like you are being given a reward for all your hard work and it keeps you wanting to do more for yourself. There is no limit to what you can achieve.
In love and light,
Fran
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